Stories from BOD

Da First Battle Against Da Nids

In one of the brew house's of a small ramshackle ork settlement Gorgrut raised a tall mug of fungus brew to his lips as he started to tell a story toa group of yoofs gathered around the table.

"Eh you dumb yoofs listen up. This is BOD. That means the Big Orky Desert. Everything under the sky is BOD. Everything above the sky ain't."

"Now BOD has two big tribes, the Red Skullz and the Ded Fangs. Red is for Gork, and Ded is for Mork. They got to scrappin now and then but nothing too excitin. But then came this weird mob called da Bug Boys. Dey painted themselves all purple and said dey wasn't for Gork or Mork, but sumthing called Torque. Somethin was wrong with dem. Dey didn't seem real orky!

So all the Red Skullz and Ded Fangz got together and went to da Bug Boyz fort and stomped dem real good. But after dey wuz all ded, we looked up into the sky and realized da real bugs ad shown up!

They poured out of the sky comin down in dese nut lookin fings. Then the nuts opened up and small ones came out, big ones came out, before yah know it da BOD was crawlin with bugs everywhere.

So wot did we do? Simple, we got in our truks and buggies and drove out to where the nut fings wuz fallin. The Nobz said ta win we had ta be speedy and shooty. So we all drove around in circles round and round firin da eavy shootas an burnin em wit da skorchas, all while da bugs was shootin dis acid stuff and tryin to crawl up into da truks an da boyz would be tryin ta knock dem off. It was the biggest bash I'd ever seen and went on for weeks on end. The only slowin da boyz down was ammo, food, an gas. But da nobz kept it organized so that fresh truks and boyz was always bein cycled out ta da battle.

Now of course we orkses was more brutal an cunnin den da bugs so we won. Dats why there ain't too many bug fings on BOD anymore. Maybe one or two try ta creep up on yah at night if yah stray far enough from BOD Town, but most of da stories yah here is probably jus squig wash.

Sum say da bugzes will come again in anuver swarm. I'm lookin forward ta da dey sure as you can say WAAAGH!